So you have been dumped or you are even the one who ended the relationship? Now what?! what to do after a break up?
Of course it is a bit different if the end was your choice (you are the one who ended the relationship) than if it is the case when you are forced or just have been dumped, however in both cases you will encounter the same feelings, same pain of loss, same hope, and may be the same amount of depression.
I know how you feel just right now, because I was there many times, but do not worry, I will tell you exactly what to do after a break up.
What to do after a break up?!
Let’s get strait to the point..
Work on your self esteem.
This may sound strange to be the first thing to do after a break up, however you will thank me for it. By raising your self esteem, you will get what you want easily. In other words, if your target to get her back, then women would die for a confident guy. However, if you just want to get over her then I can confidently say that the higher you self esteem, the faster and easier you will get over her.
Give a real chance to your mind to lead instead of your heart.
Well, first things first.. in my opinion, the first thing to do is to calm down, stop bargaining and thinking about revenge, anger, hope, depression or any feelings. Do not worry you will have time to express your feelings, but for now you may express the wrong feelings, and it very likely that you regret it in the future. So, just be use your mind for a while.
Analyze and revaluate your situation.
By analyzing your situation, I mean investigating what has happened and if it is in your favor or not? With disregard of it was your decision or her decision. Just
Shift the focus on yourself instead of her.
It is quite possible that you are thinking about her, and how she may think of you, and how she would react if you do bla bla bla. Stop it now and just be a little selfish and think about yourself. Just remember that you was in a relationship because you felt happy in the relationship not because the relationship itself. Thus your main goal is your happiness , not the relation ship.
What do you want? What do you want from her?
Is it revenge? Is it to get back together with her? Is it a mix of both of them?
You just have to know one single fact.. Most of the pain you feel just right now is related to your self-esteem and your ego. It’s your ego that hurts you not her. You do not hate her, you just hate the painful feelings attached to her. You hate being controlled by her and by your emotions for her. Do you want a relationship or is just a locationship and you just want to fall in love with love not with her? See I want my girlfriend back.
Know your enemy
Is it her? may be, but most of the time your subconscious mind is what you really should take care about and from. It wants to protect you from feeling bad which is a good intention from him, however the fact is way too different. Your subconscious mind may lead you into the wrong direction trying to make you feel good on the short term, while in the long term you may suffer a lot. Of course I am not trying to say that your subconscious mind is an enemy. See I miss my girlfriend.
What I am trying to say is that you should watch your thoughts and what the subconscious mind is telling you to do, because most of the time, and specially in time of break ups, it is actually wrong.
Shift your focus from the past to the future
This is perfectly done by asking yourself: What is the role that my ex girlfriend is going to play in my new life?
Are you going to try to get her back? Cut all contact? Or just stay friends with her? You should clearly answer this question because it is most related to the future.
What I mean by improving yourself is to improve whatever can be improved. This may include:
-Your looks by going to the gym and having a new haircut or some new fashionable clothes.
-Your dating skills: in case you want to get into a new relationship.
-Your self confidence: I cannot stress this more than I did. Be confident and you will be happy with disregard of your decision.
Whatever your decision is, it actually does not matter. What really matters is that you should have an crystal clear answer in your mind, regardless of the decision itself either it be getting her back or getting over her. Just find a clear answer, stick to it, and never change it whatever happens!
So, I am not asking you to forget her, or even to try to get her back. All I am asking you to do is to be honest with yourself, and even if your choice is to try to get her back, then okay! I am not against it, however just make sure that getting back is in your favor and it is because you really love her, and not any other lame excuses.
Now you know what to do after a break up. All you have to do is to start taking action right now.
Break Me Free Program was developed based on psychology and hypnosis and will help you get over the breakup fast and easily. It will help you break your attachment to your ex and feel confident and fine without your ex and so give you the power to move on. You can watch a free video here about how it works.