After a break up, you may feel some anger and depression that lead you to think about getting back together with your ex girlfriend. You start visualizing her between your arms again and you -both- are enjoying one of the best old romantic moments you had together.
And while you may succeed to get her back, you sometimes should not, and all you have to do is to thank god that you managed to get rid of this relationship.
I know that you may really love her and you do not hear any advice that may lead to both of you being no longer with each other. However, if you did not do it today, and even if you managed to get her back you will regret it in the future because you are actually wasting your life with the wrong person.
Here are the big signs… the red flags that if just one of them applies to your situation, then you should not even think about getting back together again.
10 Signs You Should Not Try To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back
1. It was a short period relationship (less than 3 months)
The relationship is 3 months or even less which means you are supposed to be in the honeymoon stage i.e the stage where there is no place for conflicts, however you have already broke up with each other.
You must know that:
If a relationship cannot work in the honeymoon stage, then it will never work.
But you have to know two more things:
- If the break up was because of an issue, for example you cheated on her, then there is still some hope. All you need is to get her to forgive you after cheating on her.
- If things did not work or there was not enough chemistry between both you, then working on building more attraction may (or may not) work. It depends. But I just do not want you to miss any chances of getting her back, so if you think that the break up was out of lack of chemistry then you can try no contact, otherwise do not waste your time.
2. She was constantly in need for attention and reassurance
In general you should not date (or of course marry ) a woman with a low self esteem. This is simply because she will not love you. Instead she will NEED you. And believe me you do not have to date a woman that needs you because she will make you always feel guilty and when you manage to help her raise her selfesteem, she will no longer in need or you can say she will no longer love you.
3. Your relatives and friends
How is your ex girlfriend’s relationship with your relatives and friends? Is it good? Are they like her?
If she is not in good terms with your relatives or your friends then you have to forget about her. Why? Because you will not be happy in the future and there will be times where you have to choose which side you will take… hers? Or their?
Another thing is that if she really loves you she will keep and maintain a good relationship with your relatives and friends. Right??
Do not waste your time with such a woman.
4. Too much arguments
Too many arguments are not a good sign that a relationship might work, because arguments means conflicts in values, ethics and the way of thinking in general. So, a relationship with too many arguments will not bring any happiness. Just think about it!
5. It is not the first time you break up with each other
If this break up is not the first one, then why should you get her back? To break up with her again?! Of course breaking up more than once means that you spend most of the relationship time in the power struggle stage which also will not bring you any love or happiness.
6. She cheated on you or left you for another guy (she shows no respect in a way or another)
When you do something for the first time and which is out of your comfort zone or may make you feel guilty then in the next time you will not feel that bad or guilty as it was In the first time. This is actually because it is now inside your comfort zone or in other words you got used to do it. What I am trying to explain is that If someone has cheated once, then chances are he/she can do it again because it becomes even easier for them to do it. Thus if she has cheated on you, you have to forget about her because she is likely to do it again, and if so, what will you do?
In fact, this does not apply for everyone, however you do not have to take the risk while there are many girls out there. You just do not have to get her back you simply do not have to take the risk.
7. You broke up with each other out of Too much drama.
Do you feel like your relationship can be a very good scenario for a Hollywood tragedy movie? The kind of movie in which your girlfriend plays the starring role of a very miserable girl or it is actually what she is what trying to appear?!
If so, then stay away from such a relationship. Not only will you never find happiness, but you will face many hard times and bad moods out of your drama queen.
8. She is too stubborn.
If she is too stubborn the do not worry she will come. This may seem counter intuitive, however it is the truth because stubborn people cannot accept that they cannot get something or someone, however it is not our subject for now.
The right question here is: if she comes, should you accept getting back together with her?
In fact, you should not, because a stubborn woman will not let you play your natural role as a man and a leader. She is going to oppose you in many things which will create many conflicts and arguments that will lead to no happiness at all.
9. She is too moody.
You simply cannot depend on a moody woman. If you are happy with her today, you cannot guarantee that this happiness will continue. Of course, no one can guarantee happiness and we all are exposed to have a change in our mood. This is very normal; however when this mood change becomes part of our life then this is a sign of problems. Again, a moody woman can provide you with happiness, but will turn your life into hell without an obvious reason.
10. You share the same bad personality traits.
When you share the same bad trait, life will be really hard. A relationship is like a cord that connects two persons. If one of them is pulling then the other one should loosen, otherwise it will be cut.
So, if you both are pulling, then the rope is exposed to be cut which means a break up or at least a relationship that cannot continue for a long time.
As you can see, in all the above points I do not care if she wants to get back or not or if it is easy to get her back or not, because actually before you think whether you can get her back or not, you should simply think should you try to get her back or not!
Break ups themselves are a sign that a relationship has at least one issue, which has caused the break up in the first place, so make sure you do not get back together with your ex before you understand the reason and the solution, and if the solution is not actually about you and you have no control on (like the above points), then make sure to stay away from your ex.
You may also want to check my ultimate guide on how to get your ex girlfriend back .
Matt Huston created the ex2 system and helped many guys get their ex girlfriends back. Not only Matt will tell you about killer tactics and techniques to get her back, but also he gives a complete guide named “Train your girlfriend” as a bonus to help you keep her after you get her back. You can read a complete review of the ex2 system here or you can listen to Matt’s free audio presentation here. ( Hint: the video may take some time to start so wait about 5 to 10 seconds for the video to load because there are too many people trying to access the server and watch that video).